I've had this blog window open for some time now waiting to be filled. I don't know what to say. I know what I'm feeling but of course that does not mean I know how to say it.
I've been encountering a lot of talk about change lately, and mostly all in a positive light, but with the understanding that it's not easy. It can, however, be done in a loving way with a loving environment.
It's funny, I'm in my mid-twenties (soon to be late 20's), and I sometimes act like the rest of my life is laid out and set... and almost over. Even if I feel I want to make a change, I decide it's not easy enough... I decide I'm fine where I am. I am fine where I am. I'm happy enough.
Sometimes I worry too much about representation... about the way I am represented. I was in a situation recently, in a room with lots of people that represent an area of my life. I got uncomfortable, as usual, around them. But they don't represent me. They aren't me. AND THEY AREN'T BAD PEOPLE... they just make decisions that I wouldn't make. Part of who they are is not who I would ever want to be, but I have to remind myself that while they have some affect on how I am seen, ultimately, it's not a personal affect.
Ghandi's ever quoted "Be the change you want to see in the world," has meant more to me recently than ever. But, at least for the way I am reading Ghandi's quote, the opposite, which has also been important, is Mother Theresa's "We are not called to be successful. We are called to be faithful."
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2 comments:
It's a bizarre culture to configure. It seems to be divisive within the church too. Sometimes the uber-cool factor seems no better to me than the creepy tv evangelists. I keep telling myself I can't see the heart of a person, and don't know their true motive. I just wonder why it elicits an instant gag reflex in some situations.
That is a great Mother Theresa quote! My favorite is "do ordinary things with extraordinary love".
A few years ago I came up with a joke when I was talking to my Catholic friend Jayson:
"Mother Teresa is such a publicity hound. Every time you see a picture of her, she's in front of a camera."
What I'm saying is, be the change you want to see in Mother Teresa.
Merry Christmas, Jimmy. Know that your feelings are valid!
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